WARRI PALAVA: You Go Laff Tire - EPISODE 9 [BY: HYPERGIG]

I told you guyz from the beginning that you all are in for crazy fun. Hypergig is back with the continuation of this wonderful comedy story. Una don dey laff tire abi? You missed previous episodes? Oya, see the links ----->>>  HERE!

Welcome to the 9th episode:

Run run run na wetin my mind dey tell me be that, come see race. It was just as if the current I was charged with while I had my nap was jolting and pushing me forward, I was just zooming pass things like Hussain Bolt. But as I dey run with full speed na em my eyes sight one 1000 naira note on the ground.

I knew I had two options when I saw the crisp thousand naira note, it was either I slow down and pick it and get caught or I leave it and save my dear life, but as a Lasgidi chap who will never back off from ojukokoro I slowed down and picked it up ASAP and I was back on my hasty feet.

With my swift feet I was able to maintain a sizeable distance from that muscular pile that calls himself a man, that man should have come as a robot or better still a truck. Within some minutes into the chase he became exhausted so he had no option than to just lemme go, and in my mind I was like who got the last laff punk.

Then came hunger, I had burned all my internal fuel and now am totally empty, I could even sense the worms in my sac protesting and carrying placards and all, the need to chow dropped heavily on me, the pangs of hunger struck me hard that I just had to scream in the middle of the street (EBI OH) meaning hunger in the Yoruba dialect.

Then a remake of fela Anikulapo/Anigbolapo's song ushered itself into my ears and I just mouthed it out:
*hunger hunger hunger hunger,hunger hunger hunger hunger hunger till you turn to hungerer*
Na then I come grab the underlying message embedded in the said song na only if you dey hungry na em you go understand that song wella. With hunger came headache, I became wholly miserable due to the intense hammering hunger dealt me.

My brain sef no click sey I get one thousand naira for hand wey I pick for ground, as I remembered this I just entered into a restaurant and ordered for four wrap of fufu and make them pack meat inside plate for me. I was served as if I was a VIP of some sort, the maid presented me the food while on her kneels but I just thought to myself that the respectful act was just some silly strategy they employ to get people to come back here.

The meal was worth five hundred naira so I knew I would still have five hundred naira left with me and with that I could get to the spot where I was taken from, I had everything well planned out and na to execute am remain. I finished the meal and ordered for a bottle of coke (OROBO) to wash down the morsels of fufu I had tucked into my stomach, I gulped it and I felt relieved, I felt like I was living the good life. I dipped my hand into my pocket to bring out the thousand naira note and when I did, then I knew I was doomed, the crisp note I had picked wasn't of full length, the note was a split, no wonder it was lying around on the street.

I started to panic and sweat trickled down my face, it was quite obvious that they were gonna kill me, (POOR ME). I called the maid who knelt down while serving me thinking that since she was respectful and all she would understand and consider me, but na as if I throw petrol inside fire. She raised the alarm and instantly her madam came over and inquired about what was happening, she narrated the whole ordeal to her oga at d top and added that after swallowing four wraps of fufu and loads of assorted meat I still ordered for a bottle of coke.

...to be continued!

Stay glued for more and please drop your comments.

Written by: OLADEJO MAYOWA MOSHOOD {HYPERGIG}
Ff him on twitter - @lilemir

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